18/07/15: This Saturday, the jewel in Chinatown’s crown and Lady Lloyd’s tiara, Ku Bar, was, as always BANGIN’ (BANGIN’ is a very technical term that we use in this glamorous industry, it basically means busy and has to be typed in capitals and/or said in an Essex accent).
It was wall-to-wall hits, wall-to-wall drinks and wall-to-wall hot boys. The atmosphere was electric, it was wild! Even the goldfish in the goldfish bowl at the end of the bar were getting on it, flitting around their little treasure chest ornament to ‘Bitch Better Have My Money’ (FISH BETTER HAVE MY MONEY! No? Ok).
We got chatting to a silver fox named Sajid, who said he was in London on “business”. When I asked to know more he said it was confidential. Which 100% means he works for MI6, splits his time between Abu Dhabi and Knightsbridge, speaks six languages and drives a Maserati.
Is a Maserati a car? I only know it because Britney says it in ‘Work Bitch’. It’s probably a car. ANYWAY, that’s the sort of person you meet in Ku Bar on a Saturday night. Hot men that are basically James fucking Bond. I was glad Lloyd wasn’t there, she’d have nabbed him from under my nose in a flash. The men love her, they flock ‘round.
Ku Bar, 30 Lisle Street, WC2H 7BA
Words by Dylan Jones
Photos by Mark Storey